Monday, September 13, 2010

Mama Bear or Mother Hen?

We've all heard it said, right?
A woman gets upset when someone wrongs her child;
they say she's acting like a mama bear.

A mother perceives danger for her children
so she gathers them about her like a mother hen gathers her chicks.

In a conversation I had with another mom today,
she told me about something that happened with her child.
(Nothing life threatening or earth shattering, mind you.)

The way she handled the situation is very different
than how I think I would have handled it.

She's definitely a mama bear.
I'm more like a mother hen.

A mama bear approaches the situation with assertiveness,
coming to the defense of her child
or going ahead to fight for them.

A mother hen is more likely to retreat from the confrontation,
gather her "chicks" about her
and remove them from the situation;
avoiding the battle instead of charging into it.

Sometimes I wish I was more Mama Bear.

I don't think that one is right and the other wrong;
I think it has more to do with our individual personalities 
as mothers. 

I'm not an assertive mother.
I'm happiest when we are all home,
all together--all day long.
When we are here, 
no one can say the rude things people say (to my face),
no one can stare,
no one can judge.

When we are "out and about",
whether that be at the store, at church on Sunday morning, 
or involved in activities at church or in the community,
there are times when my kids get hurt.

And I hate it.

If we are at a playground, for example,
and some other child hits one of mine,
my way of dealing with it is to keep my child by me,
tell them to go play in another area,
or we leave.

My friend would go over and tell the kid to cut it out.

I think I need to develop my Mother Bear side.

I'll let you know how it's going.

Oh--and if you would,
tell me what kind of mommy YOU are:
Mama Bear or Mother Hen???



4 comments:

  1. I am some of both, but probably mother hen more often. It really depends on the situation.

    Tami

    ReplyDelete
  2. I am a mother hen, just like you. And I wish I had been more like a mama bear!

    Auntie Tammy

    ReplyDelete
  3. I am a mother hen that can turn into a mama bear in the blink of an eye, I'll gather my kids near me to a certain point, but if you still get too close and are threatening in any way, LOOK OUT!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Definitely more of a mother hen. I think in many situations it's best to let our children sort out the problem than having us get involved. I think this teaches them negotiating and problem solving skills that they don't get when we are always fighting the battle for them.

    ReplyDelete

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